I skipped yoga class this weekend. I’ve been having trouble sleeping the last few nights and feeling generally sluggish. My spirit was willing but my body just wanted to curl up in bed and catch up on snooze this long weekend. Normally, I’d be feeling guilty and beating myself up about this but I’m learning to be a little kinder to myself and recognize my limitations. I’m confident enough in my practice that I know I will keep coming back to it. Instead of berating myself for not taking to the mat, I reassure myself that yoga will always be available to me whenever, wherever. Discipline is vital to any activity or project but so are rest and denoument.
Accepting my own weaknesses and going along with the rhythms of my mind and body have made me more accepting of other people’s limits as well. People can say “no” to me now without me feeling slighted. I don’t take things personally as much, or if I do, there’s an automatic recording in my head that goes “Get over yourself.” I still get impatient, cranky, argumentative, judgmental and everything that human beings tend to be when they are being human. Now, there’s a voice that says “Watch it, you’re going there” when all the intense energy starts to bubble up. Of course, sometimes, you just need to vent and that’s fine, too.
Also, giving myself permission not to do something makes me want to do that something more! Strange and amusing. I’ll pick up my yoga mat again on Tuesday. You can bet on it.